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 S: From the Outside [Songfic].

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Aana
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PostSubject: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Sep 08, 2008 10:34 am

I personally can't stand reading this. I'm no romance author.
But, this got some pretty good reviews on FF.net. So here it is once again...



Matt and Sora are together. Tai’s P.O.V. Sorato, one sided Taito. From the outside.

I do not own Digimon or any of the songs from the Jekyll & Hyde soundtrack.
However, if you’ve never listened to the original Broadway cast recording of Jekyll & Hyde, I’d advise it (powerful stuff). And I’m guessing that by your reading of this fic you know what Digimon is. Otherwise, I’d recommend that to you as well (seasons 01 and 02 are the best, mind).

I realize that my characterizations in this will most likely be less than immaculate, due to pairings etc. And I apologize that this is a slushy loved-up fic. Also, sorry Tai .

Three years after season 02. Matt and Sora are together, engaged. Tai never managed to confess his feelings to Matt, and now it’s too late.




Tai Kamiya suppressed a scream as he felt his heart still-beating heart being torn from his frozen body. Just meters from the spot were he lurked, bathed in moonlight and oblivious to the devastation of which they were the cause, two souls lost themselves in the others eyes. Yamato Ishida, more commonly known as “Matt”, reached for the shaking left hand of Sora Takenouchi. Tai was rooted to the spot. Tears overflowed from prying eyes as Matt lovingly slipped a small band of glittering gemstones onto Sora’s delicate finger. A fervent hug. An ardent kiss. A choked cry of pain from the shadows, which no one heard.

Tai ran.

Look at me,
And tell me, who I am.
Why, I am
What, I am.


His world was falling apart. Stumbling through the darkened forest, his clothes catching on brambles, their cruel thorns lacerating his skin. The rough bark of a tree scraped along his entire forearm, leaving a trail of scarlet beads. Tai didn’t even flinch.

He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t hear, he couldn’t see. All he could feel the agonizing emptiness in his chest where his heart had once been. Rendered useless, his mind bridged on the verges of insanity as he desperately invented scenarios to explain what he had just witnessed. Anything, anything to avoid the inevitable truth. They were rehearsing a play. No. It was a sick prank they were playing on him because Sora was still mad at him for that time when he threw up in her hat and didn’t tell her before she put it on? No, Sora was Sora. Not some weird psycho bitch. But she was going to marry Matt. Oh Matt…

Call me a fool,
And it's true, I am.
I don't know
Who I, am.


Tai tripped on an out cropping root. The smarting from the graze, angry and red, was nothing to the hurt inside of him. He choked on his own tears. The moment he’d met Matt, something inside him had changed. Matt had sent new feelings coursing through the entirety of Tai’s being, just by being Matt. Everything Tai did, was to make Matt smile. He was his best friend. No, he was more than that. He was Yamato Ishida. He was the most important being in Tai’s life. What would Tai be without Matt’s friendship? Without Matt, Tai didn’t know who he was any more.

Picking himself up, Tai shook his tired mind. It wasn’t though Matt has died. He was still there. He was still Matt. Tai was overreacting. Just because Matt was engaged, didn’t mean he would stop being Tai’s best friend. He was still the boy who’d argued with him throughout their first adventure in the DigiWorld. The boy who’d punched Tai back to his senses when things got out of control. The boy who’d never listen to his commands as “leader”. The boy who’d mastered the harmonica to such an extent, it was like a fifth limb. The corners of Tai’s mouth twisted into a small, sad smile as remembered listening to Matt and his harmonica for the first time. He’d been so jealous… He was still Matt. Tai’s constant rival.

The smile evaporated. Their rivalry. The famous competitors, Taichi Kamiya and Yamato Ishida, both fighting for the shy, sweet Sora’s affections. Or so the world thought. Tai grimaced. Little did anyone realise the rivalry had been little more than a charade. Only now could Tai see clearly. He began to walk, desparately trying to clear his mind.

It's such a shame,
I'm, such a sham.
No one knows
Who, I am.


But to no avail. The arguing, the teasing, the rivalry. If only Tai had dropped the pretences. It was all just a hoax, in his eyes at least. All of it. All Tai had wanted was the attention of a certain golden haired boy with the sapphire eyes. Any reason to talk to him. When he provoked him, it was just an excuse to talk to him, to look at him. Why hadn’t he come clean? Fresh waves of tears begun. Tai collapsed beside a shallow, slow moving river. His reflection, face tearstained and expression dismal, gazed back at him with hollow, unforgiving eyes. Why was he such a… loser?

Am I the face of the future?
Am I the face of the past?
Am I the one who must finish, last?


Taichi Kamiya laughed bitterly. It was true. When he’d been competing with Matt for Sora, he’d always been given the cold shoulder. When he’d tried to comfort Kari, she only wanted TK. When he’d tried to convince his mother that she’d be better off buying health food than making potato juice it had taken Izzy’s lasting bowel problems to convince her. The only thing he ever truly succeeded at was soccer. And even then, he was on a team. When he was on his own, Tai was nobody.

Look at me,
And tell me who I am,
Why, I am
What, I am.


And now that Matt had confessed his feelings for Sora… Taichi was truly alone. He felt distant, his body was on the ground but his spirit was else where, on another plane. He’d never felt so empty. Any feelings of life seemed to have dissolved, like sugar in water. For him, there was nothing.


Will I survive?
Who will give a damn,
If no one knows
Who I am?


As he sat there on the ground, Tai heard footsteps echoing through the forest. Murmurings of love taunted his ears. He wanted to run, to hide, to leave and never come back. But he was exhausted. He struggled to stand, anything to put distance between him and his tormentors. The whispers grew louder. Tai tried to run, but he could barely manage to crawl. He could clearly hear the sound of crisp leaves crumpling under the feet of a happy couple. They were meters away, they’d discover his broken form in mere seconds. Again, rivulets of a now familiar, hot, salty liquid began to flow unchecked, blurring Tai’s vision. From behind him, a gasp.

Nobody knows –


Yamato Ishida couldn’t believe his eyes. Here, in the middle of nowhere, his best friend stood before him. Here, on a spitefully cold night, his best friend stood before him Here, on his special night, the night Sora had accepted him, his best friend stood before him. His best friend, trespassing on the most important night of his life. Taichi Kamiya, his best friend, but he could barely recognise him. Sora was silent.

Not even you –


Bruised and bleeding, Tai raised his head in defiance. Here, was the man he loved. It was true. He loved Matt. But it was too late. Yamato grimaced as blue eyes met amber. The vitality was gone. Instead, hurt. Unfathomable hurt.

No one knows who, I, am...


Without a word, the brunette spun round, and ran off into the night.





Urgh. *is violently sick on the keyboard*

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Last edited by SugarSpiral on Thu Jan 29, 2009 12:26 am; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Sep 08, 2008 6:23 pm

Yay! This fic again, I don't see why you don't like it, I do
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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Sep 08, 2008 9:50 pm

It's too slushy, emotional and descriptive!

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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Sep 08, 2008 10:17 pm

uuh... it's romance? Laughing
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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Sep 08, 2008 10:32 pm

Exactly affraid

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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Sun Jun 14, 2009 8:19 am

Are you serious? This is really good! I have to say, I'm on Nina's side, here - I really like it. Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Sun Jun 14, 2009 9:09 pm

Now maybe we can convince her Smile

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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Jun 15, 2009 1:49 am

Yeah, let's do it! *highfive*
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PostSubject: Re: S: From the Outside [Songfic].   Mon Jun 15, 2009 12:35 pm

*highfive* Very Happy

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