Your edit had me laughing, because of the stupid image it gave me: asphyxiated fish cursing their gils.
Which really isn't too funny if you're a fish.
Oh, and after I found out that she had lied, my opinion about her changed. As in from "poor kid" to "stupid kid."
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I have my own reality, thank you very much.
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"I was biting down hard on my lip, as I wrote you a poem in orange felt tip."